All-Stars
Thursday, February 12, 2003. Entry #248

What can I say about Survivor: All-Star that hasn't been said by a million pundits on the Net and in the real world?

My own thoughts. That is, after all, why you are here.

Now, we've covered these contestants heavily in the past, so I'm not going to go through all the crap about their background and such because, frankly, no one cares. All we care about is the show and this one is shaping in lively fashion.

Right. Here we go.

Chapera Tribe

Alicia Calaway

• Age: 35
• Previous Show: Australian Outback (Season 2)
• Previous Finish: 8th voted out; 1st juror
• Alicia is looking fitter than ever, and that's a hard go. She seems far more lippy than ever before, that's for certain. Sure, she was the one who introduced the 'finger-wag' to legions of white folks, but that will only take her so far. She was the first one voted to the jury last time, because she was so abrasive. She'll go even sooner this time.

Amber Brkich

• Age: 25
• Previous Show: Australian Outback (Season 2)
• Previous Finish: 11th voted out; 4th juror
• What the hell kind of name is Brkich, anyway? Buy a damn vowel, chippie. Anyway, she spend the entire Outback riding coattails, and seems to be following the same pattern this time around. And it's working. She's in for the long haul.

Rob Cesternino

• Age: 25
• Previous Show: Amazon (Season 6)
• Previous Finish: 3rd place
• Ah, Funny Rob. There's no Magic 8-Ball to answer your questions this time. Maybe he'll be smart enough to not fall to the wiles of the pretty, pretty women. I want him to go all the way, but I figure third place again is his best chance.

Rob Mariano

• Age: 28
• Previous Show: Marquesas (Season 4)
• Previous Finish: 7th voted out
• Honestly? I don't remember him much. I know he was there, and he was aggressive, but this guy didn't even make it to the jury, folks. But he won't get pegged as a competitor until the individual challenges start. Then he's walking.

Susan Hawk

• Age: 42
• Previous Show: Pulau Tiga (Season 1)
• Previous Finish: 4th place; 6th juror
• Everyone is gunning for the originals, both because everyone wants to prove they are better competitors than the first batch, and because all of them are strutting around stuffed with their own status. Sue isn't making friends and she isn't playing nice. As soon as Chapera goes to Council, she's gone.

Tom Buchanan

• Age: 48
• Previous Show: Africa (Season 3)
• Previous Finish: 4th place; 6th juror
• Big Tom is trying to be the father figure again, but he's showing signs of cracking early on. He's go after the merge.

Saboga Tribe

Ethan Zohn

• Age: 30
• Previous Show: Africa (Season 3)
• Previous Finish: Winner
• Ethan has won before, and that makes him as much a target as the Season 1 folks. Look at poor Tina. None of the prior winners will take home the cup. But he's likeable and really fit, so he'll make it to the jury at least.

Jenna Lewis

• Age: 26
• Previous Show: Pulau Tiga (Season 1)
• Previous Finish: 9th voted out; 2nd juror
• Jenna was the eye candy in the original episode, striding around in her pink bikini, and she's lost some of her allure since them. Watching her play is like watching The Mole - she seems to be actively sabatoging the games. No Jenna, they can't push the raft along the sand with you sitting on it. She's toast.

Jerri Manthey

• Age: 33
• Previous Show: Australian Outback (Season 2)
• Previous Finish: 9th voted out; 2nd juror
• Jerri has been the most successful Survivor outside the show, marketing her 'bitch' persona to anyone willing to give her a guest spot. She's trying to play that down now, but it's too imbedded in everyone's head. Just before the merge, she'll go home.

Rudy Boesch

• Age: 76
• Previous Show: Pulau Tiga (Season 1)
• Previous Finish: 3rd place; 7th juror
• No one wanted Rudy to go home, but seriously folks. He's 76 freaking years old. He's tough as nails, yes, but his stamina is shot. Love ya, you crotchety old bastard. Enjoy your time lounging in the resort.

Rupert Boneham

• Age: 40
• Previous Show: Pearl Islands (Season 7)
• Previous Finish: 9th voted out; 2nd juror
• Rupert is starting to show some of the qualities he used to great display in Season 7. He's catching fish, performing well in challenges due to sheer will power... But I don't know. He seems less, somehow. Maybe it was just too soon after the last one and he hasn't fully recovered. I want him to win, but I don't know if he'll make the merge.

Tina Wesson

• Age: 42
• Previous Show: Australian Outback (Season 2)
• Previous Finish: Winner
• Sigh. Tina always claimed she was just there 'for the experience'. Well, three days is an experience. Everyone predicted that little call. She's too nice. AND she's already won a season!

Mogo Mogo Tribe

Colby Donaldson

• Age: 29
• Previous Show: Australian Outback (Season 2)
• Previous Finish: 2nd place
• I'm looking forwards to a head-to-head challenge between Colby and Ethan, two fiercly strong and tough competitors. Colby won a ton of individual challenges in the Outback, but lost because he was a nice guy. I have a feeling he'll go all the way this time.

Jenna Morasca

• Age: 22
• Previous Show: Amazon (Season 6)
• Previous Finish: Winner
• There are office pools all over the world betting on how soon she gets naked. I mean, c'mon! Last time she got naked for a spoonful of peanut better. She's won before, she's really not that pleasant, and is about as bright as a piece of low-fat toast. She'll go home soon.

Lex Van Den Berghe

• Age: 40
• Previous Show: Africa (Season 3)
• Previous Finish: 3rd place; 7th juror
• Lex is a wild card in my mind. He did so well before, and yet he seems ready to go any direction at any time. He could go all the way to the final four.

Kathy Vavrick-O'Brien

• Age: 50
• Previous Show: Marquesas (Season 4)
• Previous Finish: 3rd place; 7th juror
• If I never live to see her pee on somone's sea urchin-poisoned hand again, I will die happily. Kathy has the will, but not the stamina. She'll make the jury at least.

Richard Hatch

• Age: 42
• Previous Show: Pulau Tiga (Season 1)
• Previous Finish: Winner
• He still has the sheer force of his personality at his disposal, but he is just too much of a target. He is the icon that everyone wants to take down. And it's not like he's going out of his way to make friends. No way is anyone letting him win. He won't even make the merge.

Shii Ann Huang

• Age: 30
• Previous Show: Thailand (Season 5)
• Previous Finish: 7th voted out
• I really liked Shii Ann last time. She's ready to play, whatever that may mean. She just jumped ship too soon and too openly last time, and her own tribe sent her packing. She'll have learned her lesson. Top three, if not better.

So with Rudy and Tina gone, he's my order for going home:

In Ancient Times...
On Tuesday, February 13, 2001, I crafted timeless text about viral momentum.
On Thursday, February 14, 2002, I wrote exciting Prose on poker and funny things Lisa does.
And on Saturday, February 1, 2003, I penned a perfect passage on the need to make contact.

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