Tonight we saw a Christmas play.

Lisa's assistant manager, Cameron, is also a part-time pastor at a local Baptist church. We've been spending time with him and his family, and, although we don't share the same brand of faith, we've been becoming friends.

He bought us tickets for a Christmas production he was directing for the church, called Four Tickets to Christmas. Like most Christmas pageants, this involves various congregation members, their choir, etc. Plus some production elements my old church could never seem to afford.

I've got to say, I was pleasantly surprised -- I hate saying phrases like 'pleasantly surprised'. I sound so damned pretentious. But sometimes the clichés are real. The play was really good.

The singers were just shy of professional level quality, the sets were simple and well done, and they only muffed a couple small scenes. It was cool! My old buddy Tim was up there, as part of a barbershop quartet. The quartet had no lines, but kept stealing the show with their quiet side-stage antics. (As a side note, I discovered another old friend from high school, Paul, was another quarter of the quartet. I haven't seen him since graduation, which is not surprising, considering how miserably I treated him in high school. 'Taking him for granted' put it rather mildly. Of course, now that's he's pursuing the ministry, he's obligated to forgive me. Heh.)

Another side note. I LOVE barbershop quartets. There ain't enough of that going on these days.

Anyway. I have two rants about the play. And neither one have to do with the actors, the production, whatever.

The first problem was with God.

You know, why is it that any mention of God in a play or movie is never casual? When it's in a big ticket feature, it's always a heavy handed announcement that is dumped on the audience like, well, a heavy anvil in a Bugs Bunny cartoon. In a 'Christian' piece, quite often it feels tacked on, like they've taken a normal play and some editor spliced in a scene written by Jack Chick.

If a character mentions God or the Bible in a Hollywood or Broadway production, he is either: 1) about to 'save' someone in an overly melodramatic method, or 2) mocked as a religious kook, thus playing the role of comic relief. In a religious show, completely bathing the guy with some sort of halo-esque backlighting would not be out of line, considering how reverently the character's words are treated.

Neither way is right. More on this in a minute.

Second problem. The play is over, we've all finished applauding, we're beginning to get to our feet to leave, but the main minister of the church takes the stage. He then delivers a 15-minute harangue on accepting Christ as our personal savior, and bringing the church into our lives.

Here's where the anvil comes in again.

You know why plays, really good plays anyway, are so good at delivering their message? Because it is seamlessly melded with the material, so the consumers swallow the broccoli right along with the savory cheese sauce.

To come out on stage and announce the play's message, in blunt and broad terms, serves only to lessen any impact. It's like saying 'Bruce Willis is dead' to anyone who hasn't seen 'The Sixth Sense'. It doesn't just spoil the movie, but makes me wonder how dumb exactly do they think we are?

Look, buddy, the meaning is plenty obvious. And now, instead of us going home and having a healthy discussion about the play's effect on us or how it made us feel, we ended up just sitting in the car for a minute saying, "Well. You hungry?"

You know, while I am not normally very voluble about my religion, God remains a part of my life. I get annoyed when religion is handled so badly in presentation. God is not an incidental plot element, nor is he something that needs to be forced down the throats of the heathens out there, like some holy cod liver oil to keep our digestive tracks clean of sin.

Christianity to me is more contemplative, more thoughtful. It is a way of looking at life, at what is right and wrong. It is a message of love and understanding, of peace and harmony.

You ever see a samurai cracking rocks with his word? No? You know why? Because it dulls the edge.

I'm sure you are all smart enough to understand that metaphor.

Mom Rating: 4 out of 5. Mom'll think it's good I'm thinking about God. She still wants me to go to church every Sunday though.

Time Tavelers

Early Morning

Take me home, big fella

A solemn pledge to try to post daily during the month of December, as both a gift to my readers, as well as a thank you for your support.